Hulu’s Newest Original Superhero Drama: Truth to Power Mom and the Empty Axiom Five
In this current age of soundbites, social media virality, and pop-culture slang du jour, we need a new brand of hero. Yes, yes, thank God for the peacemakers and the post-makers, a new brand of modern warriors with blazing thumbs and a mastery of colloquial internet speak. Digital Marshals, fighting lawlessness in a dotcom Wild West. That’s why, this Fall, Hulu is slated to premiere a show about your new favorite superhero family: Truth to Power Mom and the Empty Axiom Five. Let's meet the team...
Truth to Power Mom – When Mom speaks her personal truth, sniveling trolls wilt from the power of her brutal honesty. Cross her and be turned to ash, gently floating to the scorched earth below. Know this, social media evil doers: Actions may speak louder than words, but not in a digital universe. Go ahead, bring that bullshit on-line. Truth to Power Mom gonna drink a glass of wine and side-eye your ass into oblivion. Oh, you don’t like that sarcastic gif of someone scoffing at you? Better stay away from the comments section then. You’ve been owned. On the internet.
Big D Energy Dad – Does the D stand for the confidence people assume a man with a large penis possesses, or does it simply stand for Dad? Big Dad Energy Dad. As in the Alpha Dad, proudly sporting skinnier jeans, a cool untucked 90’s band t-shirt and kitschy, designer brand sneakers. No one knows what fuels Big D Energy Dad’s super powers. Is it genuine, irrationally confident swag, a lack of intelligence capacity for self-doubt, or simply the ability to effectively mask crippling insecurities in public? We’ll never know! All that matters is we’ve chosen to perceive his BDE.
The It Is What It Is Twins – Hally and Haley Comet, the It Is What It Is Twins, fighting bullshit with more bullshit! When confronted by a conversational topic without a more eloquent point to make, don’t call a spade a spade, call a spade a self-evident pronoun! Be warned, you may think you’re winning, but when Hally says, “It is,” and Haley shouts, “What it is,” their combined powers of circular logic refute any and all valid and nuanced arguments. You may think you’re winning, but you aren’t. Because why? Because it is what it is.
Best Life Boy – Best Life Boy is every smiling two year old you’ve ever seen. Whatever the hell he’s doing, he’s living his best life and starring in videos that make you smile, laugh, and sometimes cry. Thank God for a child’s joy, and the social media posts Best Life Boy will always be able to look back on, seeing how happy he once was, because most of Best Life Boy’s best life is going to be living through the climate catastrophe induced Seventh Extinction. You’re welcome, you little fucker you. Smile on that.
And their faithful dog, Stan – Stan's the photogenic family doggie. For all you Stan stans, check out the Stan Stans Fan Page and post your favorite “the world is on fire and we’re all going to die” Tik Tok dance vids! The video with the most likes will receive a free I’m A Stan Stan tshirt. All Stan Stans Fan Page advertising proceeds go directly to a 501C3 public housing bunker project being built under the unlivable earth of the former Amazon rainforest.
All content is provided with reckless abandon and subject to your scrutiny. That's the deal.