Truant Memphis
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The Sweet Life of a Russian Internet Troll: Fuckables and Drugs

5/25/2018

 

I've been wondering what the sweet life of a Russian internet troll is like. What's the atmosphere and feng shui at Trollsky and Putinoff? What's a typical day at the office? Do they have quotas? Bonuses? "Like", "Share" and "Retweet" goals. Is there a troll of the month award? Since they appear to argue both sides of any subject, is there a team liberal trolls and a team conservative trolls? Team Bernie Bros? Team just say any absurdly stupid thing you can?

Are the most successful trolls treated like Kingskys in Russia? Do they wear fur jogging suits and drink fine vodkas from platinum bear skulls? Do they have groupies? Do they make the rubles rain? Do they simply take their pick of  fuckables and drugs like a Bobdamned rock star?

Basically, what I'm getting at is, in a world full of dirtbags living opulent lives well beyond the means of a normal, decent hearted person, do I now have to add fucking internet trolls to the list of folks who I envy, while I continue hedging my bets on the existence of my soul, attempting to live morally in the off chance there is an eternal life?
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